• ComradeKaz@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Using an old account for this for obvious reasons.

    I have a crush on my coworker. I am also married so I hope it goes nowhere (I would absolutely never make the first move; for it to “go anywhere” she would have to make the first move and I’d have to have a moment of weakness).

    I feel awful about this. On one hand it’s tormenting me bc society raises you to believe that you’re supposed to fall madly in love with someone, marry them and then be completely incapable of feeling anything for anyone else for the rest of your life. On the other hand, having a crush is a rush of feel good brain chemicals when you interact with them, so part of me doesn’t want it to go away yet.

    Posting this bc the research I’ve done says that this is normal, but I never see it talked about, which made me feel even worse at first. Hopefully someone struggling with this too sees this and knows they aren’t alone.

    • david@feddit.ukOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      1 year ago

      Thanks for your honesty.

      There was someone at my old job who I sometimes felt like she was flirting with me, but I’m very sure she’s just nice to everyone and has learned from early on that if you look at men a certain way and talk to them a certain way, they tend to hang on your words and want to help you out. She is very pretty, engaging and fun, but that was the beginning and end of it. Younger me would have been completely and utterly smitten but by the time I met her I could tell what the score was.

      • ComradeKaz@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        1 year ago

        I don’t even think she’s flirting with me, but I feel connected to her for some reason. Ig it’s bc we bond over our mental health struggles, and I don’t know many other people who are comfortable with being as open about it as she is.

  • Hexorg@beehaw.org
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    I had crush on this girl in my class, Julia. We were 13 maybe 14 I don’t quite remember. I had a crush but was to chicken to act on it. Then one day I get a love note. From Julia. She’s left handed and the note is obviously written by a left handed person too. I’m super stoked. Write the reply back and sneak it into her back pack… days go by, weeks go by, nothing… wtf?! when I was 15 I moved very long distance and that was that.

    Then with Facebook a lot of my old classmates started popping up there and I’ve added a lot of them and we reminisced about the old times. So curiosity is killing me. I ask Julia if she’s ever did notes. She never mentioned my note but said she was never into them and never wrote a single one. Wtf #2?!

    Then it hit me. You see, in the class of 27 we had two left handed Julia’s. And the other one always acted odd when I was around. But I never paid any attention to it.