I have three with one on the way. It’s a constant struggle to keep the place livable. Before I had children I was not a neat person and kept things livable by not doing things that made mess and staying out as much as possible. Can’t do that with kids, so what’s the trick?
You have to get it CLEAN and decluttered first, this took us about 3 days. Then its being religious about doing the daily work to stop the backslide.
I also pretty much abandoned my hobbies. I threw away so much crap that I “might need” or “comes in handy” or “Ill get to it one day” too… now I have a gym bag and a pc but I also come home to a house that doesnt immediately stress me out just opening the door. I can get the kid to bed and watch tv without feeling like I’m neglecting things.